how things are....

but first 2 pictures of my finny...

b/c he's so cute. :)

oh how i love this kid!!

this has been a tough few days to say the least. i wish no woman ever had to go through this, and yet it happens all the time & is so common. miscarriage. now i feel like i'm "one of those women" . not that it's a bad thing, but i feel differently now. if you've gone through it then you understand.

i'm hoping the worst is over. i'll spare you the gritty details but let me just say that for 3 hours last night i was very intimate with my bathroom. i had no idea what to expect & what i went through i wish no one had to. it was painful, it was emotional, it was horrible. i'm not exaggerating.... it was like contractions, the cramps that is. i won't say anything else about it. i am still having heavy bleeding but am hoping that will ease up in the next few days. i did go back to work today, wish i hadn't, but i did.

i was so grateful dan took the day off yesterday to be with me. i needed him, especially last night. i don't know what i would have done without him, theres no way i could have taken care of finn by myself.

this is a depressing post. sorry. but it helps to write it out.

i'm not going to discuss this on facebook, its inappropriate. people will just have to figure out on their own what happened, i'm not going to talk about it on there. i wish i would have never announced the pregnancy. now i know better.